The Gorram Nerd Hour Weekly Poll


Recently Brian and I decided that we would leave it up to the listeners of The Gorram Nerd Hour to decide what we review during our “B Movie Review” segment on our show. We have been posting the polls one week before we record on our Facebook page. This week we chose five movies. Each of them bad in their own way. I’m going tom list them off to you with a little blurb about each film. If you would be so inclined please stop by the page and vote. 

1) Nazis At The Center Of The Earth – starring Jake Busey and Dominique Swain. The story is about a group of scientists who go below the surface of the Earth and discover the Nazis are there and still conducting experiments on people. It looks terrible.

2) Troll 2 – starring a bunch of nobody actors who never really worked again. It’s not really even a sequel to Troll. It’s about goblins turning people into plants so they can eat them…or something equally ridiculous. I’ve seen it and I still don’t know.

3) The Stuff – starring Michael Moriarty and Garrett Morris. Directed by Larry Cohen. This movie is like Soylent Green meets The Blob. People are eating this new yogurt type substance called The Stuff. Eventually it begins to control you and then you explode.I have also seen this movie. I grew up watching it a lot. I actually really like it but I know it’s bad.

4) Easter Bunny Kill, Kill! – I don’t know who stars in it. It looks terrible. I only put it on the list because of the title. And since I start shooting our short film Lepus in a few days I figured it would be fitting.

5) The Dentist – Starring Corbin Bernsen. Directed by Brian Yuzna. A dentist goes crazy when he discovers his wife has been sleeping with the pool boy and goes on a killing spree. Again, I’ve seen this one too. It’s wonderfully bad. 

 

I’m gonna list of a few of the movies that didn’t make the list –

Big Bad Mama, Monkey Shines, Monster Dog, Faust: Love Of The Damned and Children Of The Corn: Genesis.

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LucasFilm Is Now Disney Owned?!


Unless you’ve been living under a rock you’ve heard the news. Disney purchased LucasFilm for a whopping $4.05 Billion. That is Billion with a B. This is a crazy bit of news. Nobody even knew it was on the market.

Disney wasted no time talking about their plans for LucasFilm. They intend on having Star Wars Episode 7 in theaters by 2015, the same time as Avengers 2, with 8 and 9 to follow shortly after. This is great news for Disney, but what does it mean for fans?

First off, Disney owns Marvel Studios and their comic book line. That means Dark Horse Comics will lose the rights as soon as their contract is up. There’s no way Disney is going to re-up that contract now. Marvel was the first company to release Star Wars comics back in the late 70’s and they will have it back again in just a couple short years.

Second, we must address what this means for the fans of the movies. Star Wars and Indiana Jones are both owned by LucasFilm. Fox and Paramount only had distribution rights. Now that Disney owns them that means we won’t have Lucas making poor decisions on how to handle these two properties. Instead we’ll have Disney making those poor decisions…maybe. The good thing is Kathleen Kennedy is staying on as the head of LucasFilm. This could go the same way as Marvel or Pixar for Disney where they are able to make their own decisions while having access to giant bags of money.

People that know me know that I hated the Star Wars prequel trilogy and didn’t really like Indiana Jones 4. With Lucas out of the picture we finally get to see other people step up to the creative plate and give us a new vision of the worlds Lucas created. We may also finally see a Star Wars television series.

After so many years of Lucas slowly losing his touch with what fans want we now get to see what may be a bold and creative new playground set in his sandbox. Overall I am excited. I still have reservations about it but that comes with the territory.

Lucas is also keeping ILM. That’s his baby, something he seems to care about more than screwing his fans with inferior product. One of my biggest complaints with the prequel trilogy was that Lucas seemed more in love with his technology than with his stories or actors. I say let him have the tech and give the other stuff to people who care about the stories.

Brian and I talked about this subject in detail on our podcast we just recorded. It will be available on Monday. And when my friend Dave and I record our Midichlorian Mayhem podcast (coming soon) we will be touching on it even more.

Don’t forget to go “like” our facebook page. There is always new stuff to talk about and we want your feedback. We also do weekly polls where you get to tell us what we review on the show. Go check it out. And while you’re there go “like” our other pages too. You can find them here and here.

Tonight We Read Lepus!


Tonight is a big one for me. First Brian and I will be recording the latest episode of The Gorram Nerd Hour immediately followed by a table read for our short film, Lepus.

First up, The Gorram Nerd Hour will recording at our permanent home of Samurai Comics in Mesa. Tonight we review The Garbage Pail Kids Movie. I know from speaking with Brian that the both of us hated the film with a deep burning Passion. It should make for a fun segment. We will also be touching on The Walking Dead, the death of the girl from Bring It On, and many other topics. Make sure to tune in. It will be available here on Monday.

With Thanksgiving rapidly approaching we will be reviewing ThanksKilling soon. It’s one of our favorite bad movies.

For tonight’s table read we will have the entire cast together for the first time before shooting begins in about a week. Tyler, Kelsee, Kat, Jai, Rob, Randy, Brian, Cherith, and myself will be sitting down to read Lepus together. It should be a lot of fun. We will have cameras set up so we can post some stuff on the net within the next couple weeks. Check out our facebook page for updates.

Mockingbird Lane – A Beautiful Mess


I am a huge fan of Bryan Fuller. Hell, I went back and watched episodes of Star Trek: Voyager because his name was on them. I loved Dead Like Me, Wonderfalls and Pushing Daisies. My heart broke a little every time his shows would be cancelled. The man is truly talented. That’s partly why I can wrap my head around his involvement in Mockingbird Lane and Hannibal.

Mockingbird Lane is a new updated version of The Munsters. And who didn’t love The Munsters growing up. Even Rob Zombie owns their car. They were weird and funny and just plain lovable. The new version focuses more on the weird and forgets about the rest. Sure, there’s funny moments but it’s an hour long dramatic series more than a comedy this time around. It’s like the version of The Bradys from the 80’s where it was an hour long series and Mike was running for office. It just didn’t feel right.

Mockingbird Lane hasn’t been picked up as a series yet. NBC most likely was trying it out before they committed by putting the pilot on as a Halloween special directed by Bryan Singer. The show had a lot going for it – a good cast with Jerry O’Connell, Portia DiRossi, Eddie Izzard and others playing Munsters or neighbors. The problem wasn’t with the cast. It was the tone. It’s a tall order to take a beloved sitcom family of yesteryear and turn them into a dark, edgy modern monster family. The show would have been fine had it changed the names.

This time around O’Connell plays Herman who looks less like the Frankenstein monster and more like a suburban dad with a few scars. DiRossi plays Lily who still looks like a hot vampire but oozes with more sexuality than her previous incarnation. Izzard’s Grampa is the biggest departure. He is changed from the lovable version of the old show to something more akin to Gary Oldman in Dracula. Marilyn is nearly the same in every way. Eddie looks like a normal kid but still changes to a Werewolf on full moons.

The episode centered around Herman needing a new heart because his was breaking from loving too hard. Grampa was going to go back to drinking human blood while making his neighbors into blood slaves. Grampa gets the idea of killing Eddie’s scout leader, drinking his blood and giving Herman the heart. But rather than play this ridiculous premise for laughs there was a dark, almost cynical, edge to it that made the show not work.

Fuller and Singer both tried their hardest. The cast was all very good but it just didn’t come together as it should have. If the show goes to series there may be potential there but I think NBC is going to pass on it. Granted, it isn’t the mess Wonder Woman was last year and can be saved but it needs work for sure.

I’m finding it very difficult to say this about anything Fuller is involved with but I’m going to have to give it 2 1/2 out of 5 stars. All the other projects he’s worked on are solid 4’s or better.

The Bloody Hero Film Festival


I know I had mentioned it before but the Bloody Hero film festival is coming February 8th, 9th, and 10th. It will be held at the Phoenix Center For The Arts. We are looking forward to it. We would have liked to have something in competition but we promised to premiere our short film at Phoenix Comicon. What we will be doing is our podcast, The Gorram Nerd Hour, from the festival. We will also be doing at least one panel or more and we were just asked to sit on the jury form the film festival. It is certainly an exciting time for us.

We don’t have all the details yet on how everything will be set up at the film fest but anyone who is local should try and come out for it. It’s really exciting to see more stuff like this popping up. I can’t wait to go check it out. 

 

The Barbarian Returns! Schwarzenegger Returns To Conan


Anyone who saw the Marcus Nispel directed mess that was the remake of Conan The Barbarian can agree that the movie was a lame duck. Jason Momoa was not right for the role. He just seemed too nice. He was supposed to be a barbarian after all. Now the good news. They’re not going to make a sequel starring Momoa and they’re not going the straight-to-video Scorpion King route either. Instead they went back to the man who made Conan a household name – Mr. Arnold Schwarzenegger. 

Rumor has it that they will be ignoring the events of Conan The Destroyer all together. This will be a direct sequel to Conan The Barbarian instead. Warner Brothers tried that when Bryan Singer took on Superman Returns. That didn’t work out well. But, then again, they didn’t have Christopher Reeve coming back for the movie. 

According to the producers this will be like a giant fantasy version of Unforgiven. I don’t know. Maybe the franchise is better off left dead. Should it be revived only to out the final nail in its coffin? Or could this be a sword and sorcery version of Unforgiven? I will reserve judgement until the time comes when the movie happens and is seen by the public. As we all know, there are plenty of times where actors sign on the dotted line and the movie still never happens. Thank God that happens sometimes. I don’t think any of us wanted to see Nicolas Cage as Superman!

Why Did I Watch Dead Heat?


During the dark period of Saturday Night Live there was only one reason to watch – Eddie Murphy. Period. I know Hollywood wanted Joe Piscapo to be a star until they realized what SNL viewers already knew…he was bland. There is nothing he has ever done that people look back on with fondness. Even Jon Lovitz has Mom & Dad Save The World. And, let’s face it, that really is a bad movie.

Dead Heat stars Piscapo and Treat Williams as a couple of boring cops doing boring cop stuff. Then criminals won’t die when the LAPD uses excessive force. Eventually we discover they are the undead. Then Williams and Piscapo join the undead ranks and fight against their own kind to bring down their crime spree.

This was supposed to be an action comedy yet the action sucked and the comedy wasn’t funny. I tried to think back to what made me laugh as a child to see if it made the movie better. It didn’t. In fact, I couldn’t think of a single kind thing to say about this movie other than Treat Williams seemed to really be trying to elevate the material to something he wouldn’t be ashamed of.

When I had the chance to interview Bill Oberst Jr. he told me that about how he goes into some movies with the best intentions. He said Abraham Lincoln Vs. Zombies was a good script that was hampered by budget. I believe that. I don’t know if that was the case with Dead Heat or if it was an inexperienced director making bad choices. Either way the finished product was not good. I like Williams. His performance in Things To Do In Denver When You’re Dead was amazing. His performance in Dead Heat was good. I’m really liking what he’s doing on White Collar right now. It’s just a shame that his promising career in the 80’s was destroyed by this kind of mediocre material.

I harbor no ill will toward the writers, director, or stars of this film other than the fact that I wastes an hour and a half of my time watching it. This movie gets 1/2 star out of 5. It’s painful to sit through.

Heavy On Neon, Light On Zombies – Night Of The Comet Reviewed


1984 was a simpler time. Video games were still in their infancy, cell phones didn’t exist, Al Gore hadn’t invented the internet, and movies like Night Of The Comet had a shot at a theatrical run.

Night Of The Comet starred Catherine Mary Stewart of The Last Starfighter, Kelli Maroney of Chopping Mall, Robert Beltran of Star Trek: Voyager, and Geoffrey Lewis of The Devil’s Rejects. It was directed by Captain Ron helmer Thom E. Eberhardt. The film is about survivors after a comet wipes out everything on the planet except for those safely tucked away in anything made of steel. Everyone else was turned to dust. Well, not everyone. Some slowly turned into zombie like creatures that we never really saw feed on anyone.

The movie begins by showing Reggie played by Stewart working at a movie theater. She is a wiz at some video game in the lobby. Every high score is hers but one and she gets mad when she notices that number six on the list is not her. Firm she goes to the projection booth to have sex with the projectionist. She falls asleep there and discovers in the morning that she is one of the few survivors. She goes home to discover her sister Sam, played by Maroney, also survived because she slept in the shed overnight.

The sisters then go to the radio station because the DJ is still on the air. When they get there they discover it was pre-recorded but they meet Hector, played by Beltran. Together they have some adventure that take place off camera, like looking for guns, and then go shopping. There is a montage sequence of the sisters dancing around and trying on clothes set to Girls Just Wanna Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper.

While at the department store things move along at a faster pace. They are discovered by a group of men who are infected and slowly turning into zombies. They try and kill the girls with their guns while Reggie is the only one armed on het side. The girls are on opposite ends of the store but the two armed men shooting at them stick together and just turn to shoot rather than split up. They also never reload. I guess this store sells guns that have magical reload capabilities. Eventually they’re caught and then saved by survivors from a think tank from just outside of town that is gathering up people to experiment on.

Is this movie making any sense to anyone at this point? It doesn’t make sense to me…but I still love every minute of it. There’s the terrible acting of the department store zombie guy, the weirdness of the female characters, the terrible dialogue. What’s not to love?

This movie is bad from start to finish. There’s no two ways about it. But this is the sort of infectious bad movie that makes you love watching it and hoping that the joy will last all the way to the end. I make no apologies for liking this movie and don’t feel I should. It’s something that could only come from the 80’s. People have tried and failed since. There was a different sensibility back then. Things were less jaded. People could make a fun bad movie and it was accepted for what it was. Now, people expect more. The difference is that they don’t expect more story. They just want more explosions and pretty pictures to distract them from the badness. I give this movie 4 out of 5 stars.

This movie will he reviewed on the next episode of The Gorram Nerd Hour where you will hear Brian’s opinion on this film as well. Find us on Facebook or Blogspot.

The Gorram Nerd Hour Video Podcast


The Gorram Nerd Hour Video Podcast

This is a link to the video podcast for The Gorram Nerd Hour with our very special guest, Mr. Bill Oberst Jr. who joined us for the first half of the show. We reviewed Abraham Lincoln Vs. Zombies with him there. It was a lot of fun. But don’t take my word for it. Just watch it. 

If you like what you see go “like” our Facebook page at http://facebook.com/TheGorramNerdHour